3. Chimwemwe, kuzindikira ndi zenizeni

F.M. Dostoevsky analemba kuti: “Munthu alibe chimwemwe chifukwa choti sakudziwa kuti ali ndi chimwemwe. Koma akangodziwa kuti ali ndi chimwemwe, nthawi yomweyo, pamphindi yomweyo, amakhala wachimwemwe. Chilichonse chili pamenepa. Chilichonse…”. Ife tikugwirizana ndi mawu amenewa. M’masomphenya athu a dziko (ndipo amachirikizidwa — mwasayansi komanso m’zochitika za tsiku ndi tsiku) munthu aliyense ali nazo kale zomwe amazifunadi Mwa Choona (koma mwina sakudziwa zimenezi), ndipo m’dziko lake zimachitika zinthu zomwe amazikhulupirira Zoonadi (amazikhulupirira kwambiri kotero kuti ali wokonzeka kubetcha nazo chinthu chamtengo wapatali kwambiri kwa iye: ndalama, moyo, ufulu).

M'lingaliro lotakata kwambiri — chenicheni chako cha moyo, dziko lako lonse lowoneka (thanzi lako, chuma chako, maubwenzi ako, zonse zomwe uli nazo ndi zomwe ulibe, zochitika zonse za moyo wako, zochitika zonse ndi kulumikizana ndi anthu ena komanso ndi dziko) — mwachidule, chenicheni chako chonse chalengedwa kotheratu ndi chikumbumtima chako. Ndipo izi sizitanthauza kuti “maganizo amakhala chinthu chowoneka” komanso “uyenera kuganiza zabwino”. Maganizo, ndithudi, ndi ofunika. Koma kamangidwe ka chikumbumtima chako ndi chachikulu kwambiri kuposa maganizo chabe. Tiyeni tiwone “nyumba” ya chikumbumtima chako mwatsatanetsatane pang'ono, popanda kulowa kwambiri m'zazing'ono.

Mwachidule tingathe kusiyanitsa “nsanjika” zinayi za chikumbumtima chathu: Chikhulupiriro, zokhumba, zotengeka za mumtima ndi maganizo. Zomwe zadzaza m'nsanjika zimenezi ndizo zimatsimikiza momwe timakhalira ndi moyo — kwenikweni zimalenga chenicheni chathu chonse cha moyo. Koma nthawi zambiri

sitizindikira nkomwe zimenezi, zimatikhalira ngati zonse zilili momwe zilili, popanda kudalira chikumbumtima chathu, ndipo timangoganiza kuti tingathe kuphunzira za dziko lovutali lomwe lilipo padera ndi ife, kudzolowera kapena kulimbana nalo. Koma sizili choncho ngakhale pang'ono. Kunena zoona, ichi ndi chimodzi mwa zikhulupiriro zotheka, chomwe chimalenga chenicheni chogwirizana nacho ndikumanga maubwenzi onse a munthu ndi dziko. Koma pakhoza kukhala zina, ndipo zimabala chenicheni cha moyo chosiyana kotheratu.

Kwenikweni, m'Chitsogozo Chachidulechi cha moyo, tikufuna kukupatsa masomphenya omwe amakubwezera pamalo a Mlengi wa chenicheni chako cha moyo — malo omwe poyambirira ndi a munthu mwachibadwa, koma mosazindikira timawakana, polandira zikhulupiriro ndi zikhulupiriro zina, pokankhira udindo pa mphamvu zakunja (pa anthu ena, pa maulamuliro, pa atsogoleri, pa zochitika, pa Mulungu…), ndipo nthawi zambiri mosiyana ndi zimenezo, podzitengera udindo wa ena (omwe kwenikweni ndi olenga mofanana) pa ife eni, ndipo kusuntha udindo kumeneku ndiko kumatipweteka ndi kutilepheretsa kuwona chimwemwe chathu, kusawona kuti ndife amene tikulenga zonsezi m'moyo wathu, poimba mlandu munthu wakunja pa kulephera kwathu, powopa zoopsa ndi ziwopsezo zakunja (zomwe ife enife timazilenga), kukhumudwa, kukwiya, kuchita nsanje, kupsa mtima... kapena m'malo mwake, kudziimba mlandu chifukwa cholephera kusangalatsa anthu ena.

Ndipo izi ndizo zimatikakamiza kudziteteza m'njira zonse, kunama — kwa ena komanso kwa Ife Eni, tikuyesetsa kupeza pang'ono

ndalama zambiri, kupeza mphamvu zambiri ndi kukhala pamwamba pa anthu ena. Kumbuyo kwa zonsezi pali kungosuntha udindo basi. Ndipo ngakhale titapeza zonsezi — ndalama, mphamvu, kupambana — sitikhala achimwemwe kwambiri, chifukwa mantha ndi nsanje zimatikankhira mosapeweka ku mlingo wina — mlingo wina wa ndalama, mphamvu, “kupambana”.

Ukangosintha zikhulupiriro zako, kusintha kotheratu mmene umawonera dziko, kuvomereza udindo pa Iwe Mwinicho monga Mlengi wa dziko lako, ndikubwezera udindo kwa olenga ena pa chenicheni chawo, zonse zimasintha nthawi yomweyo — udzapeza kuti uli kale ndi chimwemwe, chifukwa Iwe Mwinicho ukulenga zonse m'dziko lako, palibe wina aliyense amene ali ndi udindo pa zimenezi. Ndipo ukulenga zimenezi pazifukwa zina, pazifukwa zina ukuzifuna ndipo ukuzikhulupirira. N'chifukwa chake zonse zili motere. N'zoti sunali kuzindikira momwe, ndi chiyani komanso chifukwa chiyani ukuzilenga, ndipo kusazindikira kumeneku ndiko komwe kunakupangitsa kukhala wosakondwa. Koma pali mwayi wokonza zonse — pobwezeretsa udindo pa moyo wako ndi chenicheni chako cha moyo kwa Iwe Mwinicho, osati pamlingo wa mawu ndi zochita, monga: “mwamuna wanena — mwamuna wachita” kapena “uyenera kukhala ndi udindo pa zochita zako”, koma pamlingo wa chikumbumtima chenicheni: zikhulupiriro zako, zikhazikitso zako, zokhumba za m'kati mwambiri, zotengeka za mumtima ndi maganizo ako.

Chenicheni chako cha moyo ndicho chionetsero cholunjika komanso choonekera cha zomwe zadzaza chikumbumtima chako.

Ukufuna kudziwa zomwe zadzaza chikumbumtima chako — yang'ana pagalasi la chenicheni chako cha moyo. Chilichonse chomwe ukuchiona pamenepo — chabwino ndi chosakhala chabwino kwambiri, chosangalatsa ndi chonyansa, cholimbikitsa ndi chowopsa — zonsezo ndi Iwe. Ndipo ngati pali chilichonse chomwe sichikukusangalatsa pagalasi limeneli, ndi Iwe wekha amene ungathe kuchikonza. Ukuziwona bwanji kusintha kotereku? Kodi ndiwe wokonzeka paulendo woterewu? Chifukwa ngati uvomereza zimenezi, sudzakhalanso ndi mwayi wosunthira udindo kwa wina aliyense. Patsogolo pali ntchito yaikulu komanso yofuna kusamala yodzizindikira Iwe Mwinicho, yofufuza mozama m'chikumbumtima chako. Koma ndi ntchito yosangalatsa komanso yodalitsika kwambiri m'chilengedwe chonse, m'zilengedwe zonse. Kudzidziwa Iwe Mwinicho.

Kudzidziwa Iwe Mwinicho, osati kudzikonza kapena kudzasintha. Ndikuwona mwa Iwe cholengedwa changwiro. Cholengedwa Chaumulungu changwiro, chomwe sichilakwitsa, ndipo chifukwa chake palibe chomwe chikufunika kuchikonza kapena kuchisintha, pakuti cholengedwachi chikuphunzira chabe kulamulira thupi lake, Thupi lake Lalikulu. Thupi la chenicheni chake cha moyo. Chikuphunzira, podzidziwa Iwe Mwinicho, mphamvu zake, mwayi wake wopanda malire monga Mlengi.

Mukawona mwana wamng'ono akuphunzira kuyenda komanso, mwachidule, kulamulira thupi lake, manja ake, akuyesera kufikira chidole chomwe wakonda kapena chakudya chokoma, ndipo akalephera kuchita zimenezi, kodi mumawona ungwiro wochepa mwa iye? Kodi mumamuimba mlandu chifukwa cha zimenezo? Kapena mumatengeka mtima ndi mfundo yoti pokumana ndi zovuta zina — zofunikira — panthawi yophunzira, sabwerera m'mbuyo ndipo akupitiriza kuyesetsa mwatsopano mobwerezabwereza kuti aphunzire luso limeneli. Ndipo kenako amaphunzira zonse

maluso ovuta kwambiri. Ngati ukuwerenga mawu awa panopa, zikuwoneka kuti m'nthawi yako unakwanitsanso kuchita zimenezi.

Tikukuwona Iwe, Munthu, amene ukuphunzira luso lolenga mwanzeru ndi mozindikira chenicheni chako cha moyo, monga mwana wangwiro yemweyo, amene sabwerera m'mbuyo pakakhala “kulephera”, koma mobwerezabwereza amayesetsa kuphunzira. Ndipo ndipamene Ife takhala tikukuthandiza nthawi yonseyi, m'moyo wako wonse, ndipo ndife okonzeka kupitiriza kukuthandiza pa zimenezi, tikuwona kupita kwako patsogolo moleza mtima.

Koma kodi Iwe mwini ndiwe wokonzeka kuyamba njira imeneyi? Wokonzeka? Ndiye Masewero ayamba. Usadziikire zinthu zambiri zovuta nthawi imodzi. Yesetsa poyamba kuzindikira zomwe ukuzikhulupirira panopa (poyang'ana pagalasi la chenicheni chako cha moyo), amene umakonda kumuimba mlandu pa zolephera, amene umadzikwatula ndi udindo wake pa mapewa ako, amene uli ndi ngongole naye, komanso amene ali ndi ngongole ndi iwe... Ndi dongosolo lotani la maudindo ndi ngongole zomwe wadzikulitsa nazo pa ulendo wako wa moyo? Umapindula chiyani ndi zimenezi? Kodi zimenezi zikukupatsa chimwemwe? Dziwa: zonsezi si zinthu “zokhazikika zosasintha” komanso “zoti sizingakhale mwanjira ina”. Ndi zikhulupiriro ndi zikhazikitso zako zokha zomwe zikukuchititsa kupanga zosankha zoterezi ndikuchita motere. Izi sizoyipa ndipo sizabwino. Iwe umangozikhulupirira basi.